hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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