The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
