they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
ugly people sure do ruin things
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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