So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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