You work out of a Hotel?
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
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