I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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