i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
she woke up with a sticky ear
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize
