i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
