You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
my liver is dry heaving
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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