Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
