omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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