Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
