Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
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