Please, let me fuck your mom
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Randomize
