If i come over, it means nothing
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
We need a shit load of segways right now
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
