i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
