are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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