dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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