Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
