Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Randomize
