I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
PANTIES FOUND
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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