Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
