i permit you to call me
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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