Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
