idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
I am mentally ready for anal.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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