White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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