Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
You pole danced in your parka.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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