Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
