Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
