we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
