yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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