I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
