He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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