note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Nobody cheats on THIS.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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