very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
