The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
