this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
