As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
