drinking out of a sandbucket again
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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