i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Randomize
