Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
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