We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
