What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
