Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
