Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Randomize
