hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
