yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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