Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
You made out with two different species that night
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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