i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize
