Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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